Uni sanga bhet vayeko pani aaja 8 barsa vayexa. Jindagi pani acchama cha, kaha gayera kun din kun mod ma kaslai vetinxa pattai nahune. Jindagi chaldai ta thyo tara uni aaye paxi jindagi le euta reason payo kei garne. Harek din uthe deki, j garthe bas “hamro lagi gardai xu” sochera garthe, vabisya sochinxa ni afno sanga ta, uni ta mero bartaman ta vabisya dubai thiyin. 

Khusi thiyin uni ma sanga, chahe j kura ma sad vayepani, ma sanga kura garera uni hasekai hunthin. Ma pani ta care garthe uslai, yo gara tyo nagara, euta parents jastai. Hami bich harek sano sano kura pani share hunthyo, aaja yo garyo tyo garyo, sab. Best friends vanepani, jewan sathi vanepani, ekarka ta thiyeu.

“kaile change nahune hai, ma sanga hune jaile”, yei thyo usle malai kuwayeko kasam. I always kept my promise, I never changed, not for a day. Maile kaile uslai freedom feel na garayeko pani haina, jati time bolna vetna namilda pani kaile kei vanina, kaile yo nagara tyo nagara vanina pani. Ma bass uslai khusi dekhna chahanthe…..

Ra ekdin aayo, jun din ko malai dar thyo, tei bihana jaba ekkasi usko message haru auxa “aba deki ma vetdina, we are single…….” Estai. Imagine, you are in such a perfect relationship, not one moment of fights, and one morning you get such texts and you don’t even know the reason, what would you do? Dherai garna sake usko sathi lai sodne, uslai sodne, aru kei sakinxa ra? Kati sajilo xa hai manche lai change huna? Kunai karan pani chaidaina. Garo ta vayo nai, na kei ma dhyan janthyo, na vhok, na pyas, bass unkai yaad. Mero jindagi ma dherai manxe thiynenan, ra kehi manxe Madhya uni ekdum dherai nai special thiyin, special maneko ra treat gareko pani thiye. Tara pani…….sayad jindagi ma j huna xa hunxa ta hola…

“ma naramro vayera ho?”

“mero career ramro thena, teivayera ghar ma vanna garo hune le hoki?”

“maile kei galti po gare ki?” estai anek soch aauthyo mero mann ma jatibela pani. Aatiyeko thiye ma, euta “xora manche” jati xora manche huna kojhe pani esto kura ma aashu thamnai nasakne. Gayeko ekjana thyo, tara lagthyo ki sara jindagi sakiyo vanera. Maile chahera pani aru k garna sakthe ra?

Lageko bani kaha hatxa ra hajur? Uthda deki sutda samma mann ma hune uni, aaja vandaima kaha niskera janthi ra. Uthda suru hune usko yaad bata din, ajai pani tehi nai thyo, tara bas, uslai na msg garna milthyo na kei. Raat nikai lamo thyo, kaile nidra aauhtyo, kaile nai….vhok lagthyo, tara mithas vane kei ma thiyena. “euta manche ko maya le kati……” yehi geet ko mul character thiye ma. Ra esari nai gayo mera kehi din haru, hafta haru, mahina haru, barsa haru………

Ani ek ek gardai jindagi pani estai hudai gayo. Sayad manche khusi huna nasakepaxi, kei garna khojda pani nahudo rahexa. Na padhai ramro vayo, na haat haleko kunai kaam nai. Jaha haat halyo, tetai naramro. Kaile kai koi vaye hunthyo vanne lagthyo, tara mann tan sabai usma xa, aru kasaile tyo thau ma basnai paudaina thyo ni. Uni thiyin, sayad afno sansar ma khusi. Na kahile narmaro soche usko bare, mandir ma ajai pani uskai khusi ka lagi magthe ma. Tara sala khai, mandir ma ta hami sadhai sangai hos vanera pani ta mageko thiye ta, yo kina pura vayena?

Ek nasha metauna arko nasha chahine raixa. tara unka nasha metaune k nai thiye ra. Bistarai jindagi churot raksi haat na lagako manche ma, tehi nasha ma dubna thale. Unlai birsina suru gareka nasha le jhan unkai yaad badauthe. Ti nasha bina na mero nidra thyo, na vhok, na pyaj, na jindagi. Mero sutne sahara tehi, mero uthne sahara tehi….

“babu, utha na, k vayo mero xora lai…..babu….”, ma mero aama ko boli sundai thye dhoka bahira bata, baba le “narou na,k garna sakinxa ra, bhagwan ko khel” vandai aama lai samaudai hunnthyo. Ghar ko eklo xora ekkasi ICU ma dekhda kun aama ko man rudaina hola ra? Ma na bolna sakthe, na aama ko aankah ko aasu puxna nai. Raksi ko nasha bata suru vayeko bike ko sano yatra, sayad kudauda kudaudai usko yaad pani misiyera hola, kaha katibela k vayo kehi thaha xaina. Bato ma hidne le dekhera ambulance bolaidiyexa, ma tya ICU ma huda aliali kata kata police haru boleko sunthe. Ma tyo din ICU xirna vanda agadi ghar thyo, ICU bata niskida ghar rahenaxa, mero upachar ko lagi paisa ko lagi vayeko euta ghar pani bechnu vayexa. Jindagi var ka sapna, eke k gardai jodeko ghar, tara ek aama ko lagi ghar ta k, sansar tyhaha hudo rahexa jaha xora hunxa. Sayad ti nasha dherai vayera hola pahile, malai ti ausadi haru pani nalagne rahexan…….

“taile ekchoti pani hamro bare sochinas? Mero xora, dhanna bhagwan le bachaye. Mero babu……” aama ko aankha ma aashu kaile pani adiyena, ma afule khana suddha khana nasakne thiye. Aama le bacha bela jastai thorai thorai gardai khuwaunu hunthyo, vhok ta thiyena. Eti sab huda pani, jasko karan le esto vayo, unle ek patak vetna ya sodna samma kojhinan. Sayad ma ta usko lagi dherai pahile nai marisakeko thiye. Sala kasto din aayo, afnai aashu afai puxna samma nasakne. Ra unka yaad feri aashu banera sadhai aaune. Sutna ka sahara pani ti mahanga thula sleeping tablet khana parne. Euta vako xora, euta balla baayeko ghar, sabai esto huda kun aama ko mann dukhdaina thyo hola ra? Ekdin aama le khana kuwayera sangai sutin, bass sutirahin, na maile bolauda uthin, na kasaile uthauna sakyo………..

Tehi seto luga ma mah, jindagi ma sath dina parne manxe navayepani, sano Baisakhi ko sath……aashu, yehi karayo, sayad aba sorry vanna dhila vaisaeko thyo, mero aama kati dherai ramri dekhinthin. Bas ekchoti feri “babu, utha na” vandiye ma Baisakhi xodera daudinthe jastai lagyo, tara aama le kaile bolayinan. Feri tehi nasha, feri tehi sab…….

Kati samaye lagyo ra yo khokro jindagi jalna?? Afule chaheka sabai manxe ek ek gardai xadera jada, tyo eklopan metaune kasari? Mann polthyo, dherai polthyo, tara yi aago le vane teti dherai polena malai. Herda herdai mero sarir dadhdai gayo, kharani hudai. Rahe ta bass ma, mero kharani, ani unka yaad. 

Aaja pani tapidai xu, ghumdai xu, uslai harek din dekhdai xu. Uni hasdai xin, ramaudai xin, afnai sansar ma. Har din esari nai janxa. Feri arko bihani auxa ani aama ko rudai gareko yehi “babu, utha na, k vayo mero xora lai…..babu….” aawaz bata biujinxu, na aama hunxin, na kasaile malai utheko dekhxan…….

 READ IT ONCE EVERYONE (FICTIONAL STORY)

"Happy birthday pagal i love you and I miss you "

Harek barsa yei msg auxa, aaja 5 barsa vayo auna thaleko, rati aako yo msg bata thaha paye, aaja mero janmadin rahecha. Uni harek barsa malai mero janma din ma yei msg pathaune garxin, ani ma vane sadhai jhai, uni afnai life ma ramaudai holin vanera ignore gardinxu. Aaja pani k naya thyo ra, tei naam "Aakriti" bata yei msg aayo, nidra bata biujiye,ekxin msg herera hase, ani phone off garera chaat ma gayera churot tandai base. Kathmandu sahara,herda lagxa rahara, jado mahina ko tyo madhya raat, tara jati rati vayeni kaha sutxa ra ktm, chaat bata herda 4-5 ghar madhya harek ko euta room ma vayeni batti baleko deke, soche meri aakriti ni meri msg auxa ki vanera batti balera kurdai holi. Uff churot pani sakina lagexa, khai jati churot khayeni kaha uslai vulna sakxu ra ma, kunai din uslai chumne yii ooth haru aaja churot chumdai chan. Jati sunsan hudai janxa, teti teti ma aakriti ko aawaz sunne garxu, kasari birsina sakxu ma usle mero kaan nira aayera vaneko "malai kaile xodera ta jadainau ni pagal?". Usle yesto sodhda ma usko tii aankha ma herdai sodhthe, "Gaye vane k garxau? Malai kurera basxau ho? Arko pagal aaihalxa ni tmro lagi, patan najikai cha" mero uttar sunera halka risaudai jasto garera vanthi uni "nakarau hai pagal, ma boldina ni ani", ani sorry vandai angalo halthe ma uslai, asti matra jastai lagxa pashupati ko dada ma basera yesto kura gareko hamile. Maile jhuto nahale samma pani ni piudina thiyin uni. Mama le Qatar bata pathayeka yii baklo blanket odhda ni teti nyano hudaina, jati usle malai angalo halda hunthyo. Eutai clz ma padhtheu hami, ma physical group thiye, uni bio. Unko sapna thiyo paxi gayera doctor banne, "mero mutu ta chorisakeu, aba doctor vayera kidney ni chorxau ho?" ma sodhthe, "Oho khub hai, paxi engineer vayepaxi ta malai herna ta fursad paudainau hola tmle, engineerini liyera hidne holau ni" jiskaudai vanthin malai. K thaha uslai, uslai ekdin herna napauda aandho vayeko jastai hunthyo malai, "tmi jati tadha jau, hajar ko veed ma huda ni mero aankha le tmlai vetxa, mero pyaro pagal" vandai chumthe ma uslai. Hamro jhagada hunthyo ta sirf euta kura ma,paxi baccha lai engineer banaune ki doctor, unilai ma jastai sweet xora chaine re,malai vane uni jastai ramri xori. Yesari nai uni sanga ko ramailo ma sakiyo hamro +2.....

+2 paxi ko 3 mahina ma ghar bata uslai medical ko prepare garna vibrant pathaye,malai vane engineering garna PEA. Bihanai 5 baje kura hunthyo hamro, aba ta thulo vayeu, kei barsa paxi bihe hunxa,ani sadhai sangai,yei thyo dubai ko soch ra sapana. Bihana class hunthyo, kaile kai ma bunk hanera uslai vetna janthe, kaile uh, j hos hamro vhet vairako nai thyo. Kaile kai 6-7 ghanta samma ni vhet hunthyo din ko, tara hamilai vane 6-7 minute jhai lagthyo. 3 mahina kati xito sakiyo, pattai payina. Dashain aayo, ra ma mamaghar ma thiye, meri aakriti le msg garin malai, "Sorry binay, tara ma aba tmro huna sakdina, hami break up garum hai". Dashain ko samaye ma yesto msg auda mero k halat vayo vanna ni sakdina, na usle kura khulera vanthin,raatvar ruda ruda mero swor pashupati prasad ko vasme jastai vaisakya thyo. Tespaxi dherai patak uslai milum vane,ekchoti ta vetum vane, ma rudai phone garda ni ultai gali garera phone kaththi uh. Khai kaasari usle afno pagal lai birsiyi, bistarai sab tira block ni hani, bolna kojda ni sadhai bahana banayi.......she was out of my life

Depressed ma,aama baba ka engineer banne sapana, engineering join garnai paryo, pulchowk ma naam ta k niskinthyo, private ma vane aayo, kati thulo sapana thiye aama baba ko,ra ajai thulo mero, tyo depression ma vako ma,k garna sakthe ra......engineering +2 ko vanda dherai garo thyo, ani ma tyo awasta ma, jindagi ma failure chakna paye, fail vaye sang sangai sabai tira bata gali,usle xodeko betha, ma jhan pagal hudai gaye. Uslai mero bare sappai vandai thiye, tara pani usle mero matlab kaile garinan, mero vagya nai estai raixa manna thale. Soche, jindagi ma uhh sangai mero khusi ni gayo. "pagal" ta ma uni sanga huda ni thiye,aile ni xu,farak yeti cha, paile usko pagal thiye,aile afnai najar ma pagal xu. Aama baba ka sapana lai kasari jana dium tesari? Tara ma move on huna ni sakeko thina, ma k garum? suicide?..............pagal mann na ho kk sochxa sochxa

"Sorry binay, tetibela testai vayo, mero result ma back lageko thyo, ghar bata ni karaunu vathyo, lagyo love le garda ma bigriye. Ghar ma sanka ni huna thalyo,ma ni tnsn le pagal vathe,tmlai xodna bahek kei bikalpa dekina, tara maile kaile tmro naramro hola vanera socheko thina, ramro hola vaneko thiye, aaja tmro yo halat ma dekna sakdina. I am sorry pagal, would u forgive me?" Pagal, yei sabda sunna thyo malai usko mukh bata, khusi vayera pani usko msg reply garna kojdai thiye tara sakina, "Its too late now" yeti bahek kei lekhna sakina, usle msg garnu vanda ekxin agadi matra maile afno haat kateko thiye, jaba suicide bahek aru kei dekinna ni, dimak le kaam nagarne raixa. "kaash kei ber agadi tmle yo msg garya vaye...." man manai vandai hase, khusi ko thyo ya dukha ko,aashu aayo mero aankha bata. Sayyad usle mero kura bujin hola, tespaxi feri msg gardai thiin, ragat nai ragat lageko mero phone ko screen ma unka msg haru ajai aaudai thiye, jhan jhan msg auda jhan jhan aankha tirimiri vayo, ekxin paxi ma sute....sadhai ko lagi......Meri aakriti le vane malai msg garirahin, sorry vanne sabda dherai dekinthyo msg ma, paxi call ni garin, na ta msg reply garne koi thyo,na call uthayera boldine usko pagal, kina vane ma gaisakeko thiye.......

Bihana 6 baje, mandir ko ghanti haru bata ma biujiye, jado ko mahina ma ajai halka adhyaro thyo. Ma kina pashupati ma thiye, malai kei idea nai thiyena, tara sabai tira mera chinjan ra afanta haru dekinthe. Yeso afulai here, ma seto luga ma beriyeko thiye, malai mahasus vayo, ma marisakeko rahexhu. Mero lash lai here, maile afno haat kateko rahexu, paxadi manxe haru le mero bare kura katdai thiye, xya xora manxe vayera ni esto garne? kayar! koi le vane bichora ni vandai thiye, ma uniharu lai mero bare vanna ta chahanthe tara ma chahera ni sakina. Lash ko alikati para euta budi manxe sutiraheko dekhe, najik gayera here,uni meri aama thiyin. Mera baba ni sangai thiye, aama ruda ruda behos vayeki raixin, ra baba ni sangai rudai thiye,oripari mera afanta haru thiye. Meri aakriti tyhaha navayeni uni roko vane ma sunna sakthe. Meri aama kati dherai ramri dekinthin, sayyad jindagi ma pailo choti hola afno aama lai teti ramri dekheko i love u aama, gayera vanna man lathyo, tara bichora ma aatma, kosle sunne mero kura. Ekxin paxadi mero lash gadiyo, ma herirahe, herna bahek k po garna sakthe ra, aatma vayesi ta runa ni sakinna raixa,na roko manxe ko aashu puxna nai. Mero lash sang sangai mera aama baba ko sapana ni gadiye, ra meri aarati ko maya pani........

Aaja mero aama baba dubai depression ko birami hunu hunxa, pariwar bata xuttai basnu hunxa, din dinai ausadi khana parxa. Pani parda tyo pani ma mero aama baba ko aashu ni misiyeko hunxa, sarai dukha lagxa......

Meri aakriti, ajai malai samjinxe, mero mrityu ko karan uni ho vanera afulai dosyauxe,pagal pagal vanda vandai afai pagalni vayin. Usko pariwar le uslai hela garxan, kina vane na uni doctor banna sakin, na usle bihe nai garxe..........

Ma afule sadhai sochxu, yo sab ko karan ta ma nai ta huun, tyo blade le haat na kateko vaye yesto hudaina thyo. Mera aama buba ka sapana, ra ihh aashu, meri aakriti ko tyo halat, sabai ko doshi ma, sansar le malai maaf garna sakla, tara ma afulai kaile mafi garna sakne chaina.

Aaja mero janmadin, jun din aama roki thiyin mero lagi, bas farak yeti cha, tetibela uni khusii le rudai thiin, aaja mero tasbir ma mala dekhera, I love u aama kaash ma aile tmi sangai hunthe, tmlai depression ko ausadi haina mero haat le chocolate ra laddu kuwauthe mera baba le malai mero xoro engineer vayes babu vanera angalo halthe hola.......kaash maile tyo nagreko vaye

afno ta jindagi bigare maile,,ihh manxe haru ko jindagi ni??

Yedi tmle yo padhdai xau vane ma ta gaisake sadhai ko lagi,, tara tmi jiudai xau,,mero jastai tmlai ni tnsn vaxa hola,,ya kunai din huna sakla. Maile jasto galti kaile repeat nagara la? Yedi testo soch aayo vane ekxin kura sab thik hunxa!!

Mero churot pani sakiyo, tyo ghar ko batti pani nivyo, sayyad meri aakriti ni sutin hola,kina ki uslai thaxa reply audaina vanera narou hai pagalni dherai.

uni auxin duso mero lash gadeko thau ma, full lera, ani vanxin " happy birthday pagal". Kasle vanxa gadepaxi jalauna sakinna vanera?

 Your words do matter to some"

Yo kura chai euta life ko lesson vanum ya euta naramro part of my life , maile afule vogeko nai, about my ex. Ramro nai thyo sab, mero effort and all but eventually "dherai chini ni thik hunna" vayo sayad, and just like that, kei reason bina, she decided to end the relationship. Tyobela Ma eklai thiye, life ma first time mom bata tadha, shifted to a new place, starting a new study, ani Ekkasi testo huda, I couldn't actually handle myself. Suicide commit ya kei ta garena, but still, I went to the level of depression ki mero kapal nai jharna thaleo. Ma yo viswas gardina thiye, but hudo raixa aba. Aba jati sad vayo, jhan contact garna man lagne. Na maile cheat gare, na kei, tara pani tesari xodyo. All I wanted was reason, because reason ta pakkai hola. She'd come with reasons like tero aaukat xaina blabla. Ekdin vanyo "maile sathi lai tmro photo dekhako, ma kati ramri xu, tmi kasto xau, hamro jodi suhaudaina" vanyo re, usko sathi le. And she said yo reason thyo breakup ko lagi. This hit me so bad, I stopped clicking photos, seeing the mirror, ma garmi din ma pani wind cheater ya jacket lauthe just to hide my body, tyo wind cheater topi wala. Ani mask kaile xoddina thiye. Kasaile navete hunthyo, na chine hunthyo vayo. And I hated myself, my looks and everything went so down, because of her. Yo sab ta vayo. Years later, when I talk with her, she said ki "tmle xodenau ani k bahana banam vayo ani esto vaneko". Wow, is it that easy for girls? What about all the things that went through me after all those things she did? And even after years, when I said how much that breakup effected me and all she was "natak ho sab, kei vathena". Some people have stone heart. Or maybe some *girls* just want a PR wala. Well, somehow thank her if you're reading this, because if Tyo sab vathena vane ma lekhna suru gardina thiye hola. But please remember what you say to others. Tmro lagi kei nahola, arko ko lagi tesle ekdum hamper garna sakxa.